Be very, very careful. My girlfriend is not a gamer, and I don't even try to get her interested. On the other hand, most of the married gamers I know met through gaming. I don't think that I have ever seen a successful 'conversion'. But if she is expressing actual interest, give it a try.

I have seen attempted conversions go horribly wrong though. (One nongaming girlfriend that a player brought to the game tested a permanent magic marker on my battle mat. )

One thing that might work or help is a quick scenario, one on one. I believe that Expeditious Retreat makes some one on one scenarios for both 3.X and 4e.

Make the set up as nice as you can, World Works terrain, painted minis, a set of dice all her own, in her favorite colors. Maybe a hand painted mini of her character. (I give Jackie minis, 'cause they're purty.)

If you are running a regular, instead of single player, game then make sure the other players know to take a bath before the game! Stinky players are not as big a problem as they used to be, but Jeez guys....

An RPG/Boardgame hybrid might be easier to use than an actual RPG - Warhammer Quest, Decent, etc.. Maybe even Mordheim if she is competitive. If you roleplay your heroes in Mordheim you might be surprised how quickly other folks start to do it as well.

The Auld Grump

Is this the girl you were trying to date in your other thread?

I would say that you have to weigh both sides.

1) Yeah it would be fun to game with her if it works out.

but...

2) I know you want to be with her all the time, but consider the fact that gaming provides you both with some alone time (absence makes the heart grow fonder!) and your game won't be messed up if the relationship goes south.

I vote for not pushing it on her at all. If she asks to try it out, go for it, but be warned. Otherwise, just let her know it is one of your interests and leave the ball in her court.

Self imposed DADT? Mine is enforced by my wife. If she hears me say a forbidden term (RPG, Munchkin, WorldWorks, D&D, etc.) to a new acquaintance on whom she wants to make a good impression, I get THE LOOK - and an elbow if she's close enough. She did a lot of tongue-biting recently when this guy asked me if I'd ever heard of Reaper minis. 30 minutes later I had to excuse myself so I could pour cold water on her steaming noggin.

Start off with some casual video games and see if her interest grow from there.

My wife is not a gamer, but she enjoys Munchkin every-now and then.. Some friends of ours introduced us to it so i think that helped alot. If you can convince mutual friends of yours to play then I think that goes a long way..

That said, she has no interest in Pen and paper games or video games.


I generally don't broadcast to people that i like P&P because of the mixed responses I get. Some people are cool with it but then you have a few dicks who treat it like the plague. I test the waters with video games, then munchkin, and then p&P.


Its all about baby steps and gateway gaming.

I'd start with more staples before seeing if she like role playing games.

Seriously.. if you don't like games too much, then role playing is way out.


Try Settlers of Catan, or for two players, the Settlers of Catan card game. Talisman would also be good. Magic is also a blast if she gets into it. Have I mentioned the power of strip Magic?


In all honesty, when it comes to games and role playing games, etc. It really boils down to who you have to play with. If its a fun crew, then it'll be fun no matter what. I'd introduce her to the crew with a fun board game like Talisman. I'm sure your pals will help.


I'd also listen to Grump on this. You can't 'make' someone like something. You need to treat her as something external, and see if she's interested. My wife plays many games with me, but she's not that into it. It also adds a new dynamic to your relationship that's not always obvious. Some chicks don't like you going out with your pals all the time, and try to jam the relationship you have with your friends. Ditto with your friends. Furthermore... just pretend this works out... you may wind up spending less time playing your games and more time with her.

Take your time and figure out how this will work.

Thanks everyone! I asked her if she had anything she really wanted to do this weekend, and she said board games! So that is a start, and that was with no prompting from me.
@UHF - Talisman is one of my favorite board games, but I don't own it and my PnP build isn't finished yet... but you're right, I think that would be a good transition into an RPG.
I don't think I'm gonna suggest playing D&D. She knows I play it, so if she wants to try it she'll speak up. We'll probably play Carcassone, maybe heroscape, Blokus, stuff like that on the weekend.

This is always a double edged sword.

My wife doesn't play (never has) and that creates a lot of tension, especially when I would disappear for an entire day (guess that's like golfing ).

Having someone who share's your interests is a HUGE boon to the relationship.

I do hope that she will get into it. Of course be prepared for you mate's to accuse you of favoritism if you are the DM and she's a player (That is based on romances from High School through College).

But as everyone else has kind of pointed out, board games... which usually means monopoly etc, then intro gateway games (like Battlelore or Descent or WOW Board game or WOW Adventure game).

But then you are young.... and she will probably be the first of many

Thanks guys, that looks like a fun little game! I shall build it soon.... (which could not be soon at all!)

Ooo harsh, maybe some people really don't like D&D.

Remember if it wasn't her, you'd be with somebody else...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gaid72fqzNE

Who knows... maybe she just likes rowers!
Picture deleted because it did not comply with forum rules, Moderator

Just a thought, but my boss and my best friend are going through divorces right now. Messy ones. (My friend's wife started sleeping around.) The only thing in common is that neither marriage was happy to begin with.

So keep that thought in mind. If it ain't happy, it ain't worth it. You can always get another date, and never fear being alone. (You don't want to be that whipped guy that got married just cause the first girl said yes.)